Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
