That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
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