I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
