you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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