I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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