we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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