plz talk dirty to me
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
