Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
