office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
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