Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
