i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
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