Me. At least after what I've been through.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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