Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
It's Friday. Sex?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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