Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
