A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
