Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
my poor anus
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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