She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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