david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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