Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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