I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
