i just made my gag reflex go away.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
