I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
