You just made me feel so damn special
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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