can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
