This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
