the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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