Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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