Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
