I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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