don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
