She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
