I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
