Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
