you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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