Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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