I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
