He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
