We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
Randomize
