My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
