Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
