Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
