I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
