sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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