I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
