Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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