Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Randomize
