I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i think i have herpe
just one?
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
