Where are you?
In a non slutty way
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
