Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
