And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
